And now I will describe my mood with a photo from The Royal Tenenbaums:
Yep. That's pretty much it. It was a hard day to get through. I'm still getting through it.
I had a great day on Wednesday, let me tell you about that.
I woke up, got my oil changed and my car inspected. She passed! Then I got a coffee. Iced vanilla chai with espresso and soy milk. It. Was. Delish.
Came home, SHOVELED. Like cray. In front of the garage, the side path to the garage door, and then in front of the mailbox. Which was terrifying because my road is busy. I was really scared, which was actually great because I did it in like prob under 10 minutes. Well, maybe under 15 minutes. But it was HARD. The snow was like, at least two feet deep in parts from all the plowing.
BUT, I knew that MAYBE a letter from Ben would be coming soon, and I didn't want my laziness mixed with snow piles to be the reason I didn't get it.
THEN, I took a shower and got ready to go out for
MANICURES! Me and my friend Julie went to get manicures! It was way fun. I got a shade of teal that perfectly matches my purse :) It's perfect. They look so pretty! I got the gel kind so it should stay on for a couple weeks. And I decided I'll get them done again before I go to Chicago in six weeks. And, I think it was a great deal. It was $30 PLUS they did the paraffin dip on your hands. It was really nice.
Treat yo' self!
Then we got margaritas!!!! YUM. That was really fun, too. Lots of girl talk. Love it.
Then I went home and had to get ready to go to the gym with Kara. Met her there, did some workin' out.
Came home, watched more GIRLS. Started Season 2. (Don't judge.)
And (I won't give anything away) there is a part where one of the main characters finds herself jobless and wondering what she's going to do for work.... And I'm thinking to myself, "STRIPPER!"
No deal. The show STILL isn't about strippers. Even in season 2. But, there was THIS PART:
In case you can't see, SHE'S EATING COOL WHIP WITH A SPOON RIGHT OUT OF THE CONTAINER. And that was the moment where I thought, "yes, this show is perfect."
And, again:
And this this picture, SHE'S EATING A WHOLE CAKE WITH A FORK.
OBVIOUSLY this show is called GIRLS because she's doing everything I WANT TO DO.
We all have those days where we just want to eat a whole can of whipped cream. Man, I was laughing so hard at the Cool Whip scene. I even wrote to Ben about it in a letter. I was like, "YOU'LL NEVER BELIEVE WHAT SHE DID ON GIRLS!!!!"
Because on all the Navy forums, they say to write about things in the "real world," like, what's happening on certain TV shows, sports scores, etc. Now, I love the guy, but I'm not going to send him sports scores. I wouldn't even know where to go or who to ask to find out that stuff. It's like hard drugs.
So instead, he's getting updates on GIRLS, which is a show he's never seen. :-D
Anyways. So, I come home from work on Thursday and I'm getting closer and closer to home and thinking, "there might might might maybe be a letter in the mailbox..." but I wasn't getting TOO excited because last Friday when I thought I would get the form letter with his address and I didn't - I cried the whole night. Like a lame girl.
So, I stop at the end of the driveway and get out, admiring the newly shoveled path to the mailbox. There were fresh tire tracks in the mud, so I knew we got SOME mail. I opened the mailbox and saw an envelope that definitely didn't look like a bill. It could have been for my roommate.... I took a closer look...
♥ it was my letter. My first REAL letter!!! So I RAN inside, gave Ruby a hug, threw off my jacket and purse and dropped my work bag on the ground - I was SO EXCITED. This letter would be the longest communication I've had in OVER two weeks!!! And I was just so proud of myself thinking,
JULIE: I'm so excited to get this letter - I'm not even going to cry!! I'm just too excited for crying!!
I jumped on the chair by the window, opened the letter, burst into tears.
Oh well. I've pretty much been crying ever since. Yeah, just like one of those LAME GIRLS whose boyfriend leaves for the Navy and then she cries all the time.
AS LONG as I don't turn into Bella in the second Twilight - I'll be okay. That shit was pathetic.
But, I mean, my first letter. OBVIOUSLY I'm going to cry.
So, I read it through twice immediately. It was really funny. Made me laugh, made me cry. It amazed me to read how many of the same things we said to each other. For serious. And he said he made a calendar in his notebook to count down the days, and that made me happy, because I'm crossing off the days on my calendar that I stressed so much over buying.
I wasn't sure if having it would make it seem longer or shorter. It took some hard brainpower. But, ultimately it was a good decision.
It sounds like overall - Ben is doing okay. Some parts he really seemed to doubt himself, which I assume is normal, but made me sad. At the same time, made me happy because I think I've written very good letters so far. He said once he had heard from me it would make him feel better, and I have no doubt about that.
I'll be okay. Today was just hard because it made me miss him a lot. And I just felt angry all day we can't talk.
Like, last night I wrote a letter in RESPONSE to his letter, which felt really good! It felt like having a conversation! But then today I was angry.
EMOTIONS.
Ben gave me a moonstone ring before he left, because you're supposed to give a loved one a moonstone if you're going to be away from there for a while, but it's also supposed to give you emotional support. Ya know, like how the 'moon controls our emotions..' Sometimes I think it's working and sometimes I think it's making me more emotional.
But OVERALL - I think I'M doing okay. Like, really okay. I'm surprised that I'm not crying myself to sleep EVERY night!
ANYWAYS, I just made a BOSS playlist. I even downloaded the Broadway version of 'Kiss the Girl' to put on it. The movie version just wouldn't do. Yes, I'm talking about The Little Mermaid.
Playlist also includes favorites by Selena Gomez and Demi Lovato. You thought I was lying when I said it was BOSS....
So this weekend:
- I have a very busy day tomorrow. I have a lot to accomplish. I can't tell you what it is.
- SUNDAY I'm going to see A Chorus Line with Alana!!! She just texted me today asking if I'd be interested and I was like UM YES I LOVE CHORUS LINE. At Seacoast Rep.
The last time I saw Chorus Line live it was at Seacoast Rep the summer between my Freshman and Sophomore year in high school. Why do I remember this? Because JOSH YOUNG was in it. Yes, that same Josh Young that was recently nominated for a TONY for being in Jesus Christ Superstar on Broadway. LOVE HIM. Sooooooo much. Probably forever.
Oh Josh Young. Don't get me started. Don't EVEN get me started. But everybody in the world should see him play Marius in Les Miserables. EVERYBODY IN THE WORLD.
Alright. It's about that time where I'm so hungry that I shut down and start panicking because I have no food and I hate cooking. I should get into bed and watch GIRLS. Yeah, that's what I'm gonna do. I had some gluten-free bread when I got home from work, thanks to Jenn Sabin's mom. It's great. I love it.
Ever get bruises on you leg from scratching it too hard? I have one of those right now. As I grow up, I'm realizing that I bruise very easily.
OK. Time to get out of the bath. HA. Yep I was totally in the bath this whole time.
See, I was having a really bad night, and then I came here and started talking to you guys, and now I feel better. Thanks for listening.
Have a great weekend! Spring Breakers came out in theaters tonight! Kara has big hopes for this one. We're seeing it ASAP.
Bye, friends!
love,
Julie
we both go together if one falls down
i talk out loud like you're still around
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