Sunday, August 9, 2009

"the great kings of the past are up there."

third night as a stargazer!!!

tonight went much better than last night. i went out there on a mission. i had just painted my nails blue and i think that helped. and earlier today, i had gone out to the daycare lawn and set up some chairs for me to sit on. and put my feet up. so, i was off the ground. and i said to myself, "i'm going to walk out the door and straight into the daycare lawn. no looking around." because if you look in the trees at nighttime, you start to see things that aren't there. there would be no scaring myself tonight.

so, i got all set up on my chairs. in the same spot i was the first night when i met the skunk, only sitting in a chair now. i was totally prepared to meet the skunk.

i told kara about the skunk and she said,

KARA: You met a SKUNK?? No way! What was his name??
JULIE: Well, he introduced himself as Louis, but I think he looked more like a Jack.

so, he is now officially Jack the skunk. he stayed home tonight, though.

it was pretty cold. 49 degrees, actually. i had two blankets, sweatpants, a hoodie, and fleece socks. i only saw one shooting star tonight. that was okay, though.

i was very lonely out there tonight. i got pretty sad. i was happy, until the song 'What Can I Say' by Brandi Carlile came on my ipod playlist. some of the lyrics are, "i'm so sad since you went away.....alone is the last place that i want to be." it's a beautiful sad song. and then it was like a huge wave of sad. and i was like, "oh holy crap i'm outside alone at 2am. there's nobody here with me. i don't know anybody. i have no human contact."

and it was so quiet outside tonight. quiet makes things more lonely. and then the song ended, and i was happy about that because a happier song would surely come on. and i was happy, because it was Coconut Records song. 'Saint Jerome.' and i love that song. but, there's a lyric that goes, "i don't never ever want to be alone." and i was sad again.

and then pretty soon after that, it got cloudy. and they were really beautiful clouds. i wish i had brought my camera out with me. it looked like a giant ribcage across the sky.

and i kept thinking of the quote from The Lion King, where Mufasa tells Simba, "Look at the stars. The great kings of the past are up there, watching over us." and then i didn't feel so lonely.

and now i'm tired. it's a quarter to 4am. bedtime. Sleepy Tuesday has been asleep for a while.

have a great Sunday. talk to you later.


Whatever happens in the end, I don't wanna lose you as my friend.


<3

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